Perhaps it takes little awakenings of the senses, perhaps it just takes time to realize things. Whatever the case may be, when I realize something, as in have an epiphany, I do not sit back and just wonder about it. The awakening happened for a reason, there was something that set the switch to on so a new process could be started. I realized more than one thing in these past weeks; one would be that I do not like change or having to adapt to change. I would be content to have things stay the same until I am good and ready to have them change; I want to be the harbringer of change. I realize this and because I am aware of such archaic notions inside my head I feel that I am able to learn to adapt. Change isn't always going to come from me sometimes; heck almost always, life is going to force you to see changes and adapt to them. So now with this epiphany in hand I come upon another; I love my life. Pretty basic in a sense but the complexities of what makes this "my life" are so much more profound. The little things and the big things; the end things and the beginning things. I look about me and I have to laugh because not even two years ago I would have never imagined my life could be so close to normal and functioning. My children are safe and happy; doing well in school and everything for the better. My drive has gotten me into a nice niche of constantly changing opportunities with my job; my career I should properly state. I have been learning to love; not just others but most importantly myself because without self love there can truly not be love for others. I have learned so much and I have learned to let him love me in a normal way; not requiring the dysfunction of the past. His love and patience have moved mountains; for me and for the kids. We have built a life, a love and a family. For this I couldn't be happier with the epiphanies I encounter. I appreciate all then lessons I learn and all the growing I do. I appreciate the life I have with them today and future I am building for them tomorrow.
